The Turmoil of Tense Parental Relationships

When the noises around you get too loud, you may feel inclined to stay silent. You may feel helpless, alone, and, most commonly, afraid. Having grown up in a household with parents who frequently argued, I can tell you firsthand that it is not easy to stay strong and continue your way of life. The helplessness you feel as your parents fight is unlike any other, since the support network you have grown to rely on feels as if it has begun to break. Nonetheless, it is not impossible to remain positive, as I and many other children have already done so. In this article, I will discuss three strategies which you can use to cope with the pain you may feel as your parents argue, ensuring your happiness is not compromised.

Share your Trauma with the Friends you Trust

Although many individuals try to repress their trauma, it is much more beneficial for your mental health if you learn to come to terms with it. Your trauma can never be entirely erased from your memory, so by shaping your identity in accordance with your sorrowful past you can become a better person than you ever dreamed of.

When the relationship between my parents first began taking a turn for the worse, I pretended that everything was fine. At school, no one could understand the fear I was feeling because I hid it from the world. However, my peace of mind and mental well-being were the cost to this facade.

After a couple of months, I realized that I could no longer put myself through such pain alone. I needed someone to talk to, someone who could understand me. so, I turned to the friends whom I had spent my entire life with.

I told them how helpless I felt at home, and how I just wanted someone to talk to. And, being the true friends that they are, they listened to every word of my pain. It felt as if a weight had been lifted off my chest, because I was no longer carrying that weight alone. I felt freer than I had since my parents began arguing with one another, and it was all because I decided I would no longer silence my suffering.

Seek 24-hour Counselling Services

Professional advice is always useful in times of need. I remember one day after my dad stormed out of the house–leaving my mom crying alone in her room–I decided I needed assistance as soon as possible. The whole situation was simply too much for me to handle as a young child, and I wanted someone older to help me understand I was going to be okay.

I reached out to Kids Help Phone that night, and I truly believe that the conversation I had ended up saving my life. Even if it might have been obvious, hearing that I was capable of moving past this from another perspective gave me the motivation to continue pushing forward.

I realized that my external surroundings could not define who I was set to become, and from that day forth I began working harder than ever before.

Today, I live and breathe for one desire: achieving my goals to create a happier life for myself. Yet, without the professional advice I received, I would not have turned my pain into motivation.

Remember that You have Control over Your Life

This last piece of advice comes from years of witnessing intense conflict between my parents. If there is one thing that I have taken away from my traumatic childhood, it is that no external events can restrict how big I decide to dream. I have accomplished numerous feats even during nights when all I could hear was the sound of my parents yelling at one another. I have grown to become an independent, capable young woman who is not afraid to take responsibility to independently work towards her goals.

Sometimes, I wonder how I could have persevered when it felt like all the odds were stacked against me. My parents were not always by my side and I was left isolated and alone. Even so, I kept telling myself that I had what it took to succeed, and that no one was going to stop me from reaching my ambitions. Now, despite the turmoil which continues within my household, I am able to navigate past it while sailing happily towards my goals.

In conclusion, it is no easy task to persevere when you are all alone, especially when your parents are no longer there to continuously support you. However, by learning to use your trauma as a mechanism to motivate you even more, you will soon be able to accomplish anything you set your eyes on. Nothing will be able to stop you.

Nikiita Kumar is a grade 10 student who longs to make a difference in the field of healthcare. She pushes herself day after day to inspire the youth of today, as she knows they are the future of this world. In her free time, Nikiita enjoys reading, playing the violin, watching movies with her family, and listening to Blackpink or Taylor Swift.

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